tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4966405019276327514.post7372625711000562709..comments2023-11-05T03:14:05.900-05:00Comments on The Blutonian Death Egg: In The Beginning...Rusty Carlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09887821877521181811noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4966405019276327514.post-87261719248302642822011-01-31T21:38:54.161-05:002011-01-31T21:38:54.161-05:00Hey Stephen - Yeah, the opening line bit from a pr...Hey Stephen - Yeah, the opening line bit from a previous post was just because I sampled 10 different books and was too lazy to copy the entire opening paragraphs. <br /><br />If you have a knockout opening paragraph then I'd say you've won half the battle.Rusty Carlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09887821877521181811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4966405019276327514.post-52342660633246244192011-01-30T22:55:42.848-05:002011-01-30T22:55:42.848-05:00I gave up on an opening line and settled on an ope...I gave up on an opening line and settled on an opening paragraph. It was too mind boggling and frustrating to have that one awe inspiring first line. Maybe on my next book I can think of that great one liner. Best wishes to you!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4966405019276327514.post-28101888636581065982011-01-30T21:56:55.564-05:002011-01-30T21:56:55.564-05:00Thanks Wannabe - when I emailed a copy of my lates...Thanks Wannabe - when I emailed a copy of my latest draft to myself for backup I wrote a short note in my title that said "Tone tone tone... that could be a problem". It was a warning to me that I'm worried about having a consistent voice throughout the novel. <br /><br />As I've mentioned several times before, I started on this six years ago. That's long enough for my writing to change a lot, as well as me as a person. I'm worried about me going from sarcastic to wimpy to tough and all over again because different passages were written so far apart in time.<br /><br />That said, I liked the second one too, it's more or less the second paragraph now (I did change the word hiccuped). It may get changed again soon though. We'll see.Rusty Carlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09887821877521181811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4966405019276327514.post-8954574727986233352011-01-30T20:50:24.718-05:002011-01-30T20:50:24.718-05:00Am I weird for really liking the second one? The f...Am I weird for really liking the second one? The final one is great too, but give a very different feeling. I think I like the second one, because the image is so fun. Makes me giggle (and hiccup?).Wannabe Writerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02536810143228961531noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4966405019276327514.post-34257326846186374872011-01-29T23:10:20.831-05:002011-01-29T23:10:20.831-05:00Mister Sharaf - as always, thank you.
Les - phhht...Mister Sharaf - as always, thank you.<br /><br />Les - phhht, by the time it's over I'll just be happy if I have a coherent sentence. It's all about the opening.<br /><br />Nancy - The first one was the opening line I turned in at Julia's workshop all those years ago. It is a bit more tender, but the entire first scene seems really sappy to me and I thought I should reel it in just a bit. As it is now (my latest version) it's still borderline melodramatic but I would hope that the first line sets the tone for the larger story that the novel itself tells - which is a bit different in tone than the opening might lead you to think.<br /><br />Also, I suppose it's possible to over think things a bit. But I really want the first few pages to be as tight as possible.Rusty Carlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09887821877521181811noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4966405019276327514.post-82967891557455670232011-01-29T22:48:53.346-05:002011-01-29T22:48:53.346-05:00Jeff liked the last one best but wasn't sure w...Jeff liked the last one best but wasn't sure why. I liked the original best because it put me in the middle of a scene I could visualize. It seemed like it had a better voice to it. But everybody's got an opinion and you have to go with what you think feels right. I think it is awesome that you are moving forward.Nancyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12269660745591215804noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4966405019276327514.post-56896259145449801382011-01-29T20:00:19.062-05:002011-01-29T20:00:19.062-05:00Five attempts at the opening lines, hey. Can't...Five attempts at the opening lines, hey. Can't wait to see your take on the last lines in the book.Leshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16858199029425801123noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4966405019276327514.post-54883819583726143202011-01-29T19:30:42.947-05:002011-01-29T19:30:42.947-05:00niceniceMister Sharafhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07037301918605272211noreply@blogger.com